Oprah and India Arie

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

oprahindiaarie

Singer. Songwriter. Poet. Grammy Award Winner.

The beautiful and poised young woman who sat down with Oprah on yesterday’s Super Soul Sunday took the music world by storm at age twenty-four. She impressed all of us with her musical affirmations, among them the memorable “I learned to love unconditionally/Because I am a queen.” Later, she went on to sell over ten million albums and win four Grammys.

Along the way, India Arie faced many personal challenges.

Early in her career, she received the worst snub in Grammy history when she was nominated in seven categories and lost each one. For months on end, she was surrounded by that conversation and continued to feel the hurt and humiliation.

In 2009, she found herself at a spiritual crossroads after dealing with a broken engagement and an exhausting cross-country tour. She shocked her music label, her fans and her family when she retired and went into seclusion. Knowing that her soul was sick and that she needed a cure, India moved to an island where she slept, prayed and watched the water.

India admitted that unworthiness was once part of her calling card. Afraid of failing and succeeding, she yearned to stay in a safe place. She strongly believes that the breakdown was God’s way of giving her a breakthrough.  She finally felt secure enough to ask and answer that all-important question:

What would I do if I knew I was 100% worthy of this?

Quotable quotes from India Arie and Oprah…

Your self worth is your job.

All physical ailments start in the spirit.

Your sense of authentic power is directly proportional to how aligned you are.

The voice of the world will drown out the voice of God, if you allow it.

You are responsible for your own life. Don’t wait until the end of your life to figure that out.

Be clear about your intention and the universe will rise to meet you wherever you are.

You are it. You are the one you have been waiting for.



Book Review: The Execution of Noa P. Singleton

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

executionGone Girl. The Other Typist. The Silent Wife. The Execution of Noa P. Singleton.

Introducing unlikeable protagonists who may not be reliable narrators seems to be a trend among authors launching debut novels.

In The Execution of Noa P. Singleton, we meet a young woman who is sitting on death row, awaiting execution for murder.  We quickly learn, within the first three pages, that she “was lucid, attentive, mentally sound, and pumped with a single cup of decaffeinated Lemon Zinger tea” when she pulled the trigger.

But of course there is more to her story, a story that is told during the six month period leading up to X-Day.

Somewhat reconciled to her fate, Noa is surprised by the unexpected visit of two lawyers: Oliver Stansted, a young, naive Brit who passionately believes she was wrongfully sentenced to death and Marlene Dixon, a high-powered attorney who also happens to be the mother of Sarah, Noa’s victim.

A strong advocate of a new agency called MAD (Mothers Against Death), Marlene has undergone a change of heart since testifying at Noa’s trial ten years previously. She no longer believes in the death penalty and wants to help commute Noa’s sentence. At first, she appears to be taking the high ground, but a different Marlene emerges in the letters to her dead daughter, which are interspersed throughout the novel.

Noa’s story slowly unfolds as a series of flashbacks. We read about her mother, a failed community theater actress who shamelessly neglected her daughter and the absentee father who showed up several months before the horrendous crime. In fact, his intrusion in Noa’s life sets in motion a series of events that ultimately lead to Sarah’s tragic death.

The theme of betrayal runs rampant throughout the novel. Noa’s former friends and classmates turn on her, describing her as a pathological liar with manipulative tendencies. Her mother’s acting skills fail her as she shamelessly flirts with the prosecuting attorney while testifying on her daughter’s behalf. As for her father, he didn’t even testify. After the trial, everyone disperses, leaving Noa to face ten years of incarceration before “X” day.

Author Elizabeth Silver has written a thought-provoking novel about that “gray middle ground” between legal innocence and actual innocence.

Oprah and Phil Jackson

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

oprahjackson

Holy Roller. Student of Philosophy. Truth Seeker. Zen Master. One of the greatest basketball coaches of all time. Best-selling author of Eleven Rings: The Soul of Success. Tallest guest on Super Soul Sunday.

Born in a strict religious home, Phil Jackson recalls spending most of his time in church. While his parents groomed him to become a minister, Jackson found his true calling in sports. Basketball and baseball were his doors to freedom and a college education. During his first semester at college, he received a rude spiritual awakening. Learning about Darwinism threw a monkey wrench into the mind of the good catechism student who had memorized 175 scriptures. He changed his major to philosophy, psychology and religion.

During the telecast, Jackson shared some of his experiences as player and coach in a world filled with “a lot of tall egos and money.” He has firsthand knowledge of the harsh realities that exist within the NBA. The players live in a constant state of anxiety, worried that they will be hurt or humiliated, cut or traded.

As a coach, Jackson focused on building up the mental strength of the players. He provided opportunities to explore by introducing them to yoga, Tai Chi and meditation. In the end, meditation stuck.

Three Zen Principles that have shaped Phil Jackson’s life…

Giving up control

He begins each day with a quiet mind and prefers to sit back and observe. A tactic that served him well in his dealings with Dennis Rodham, the rebel and rule bender who was well known for his aggressive plays and his antics off the basketball court.

Trust in the moment

Even in the tensest moment, Jackson is able to center himself. He advises anyone struggling with this principle to ask themselves the following question: Is what’s happening at this moment going to destroy your life?

Living in compassion

When Oprah commented that it is difficult to be compassionate about our competitors, Jackson countered with, “I’ll bring out the best in you and you bring out the best in me.”

Quotable Quotes…

Basketball is a spiritual game.

One breath | One mind

A leader has to create the space for other people to step in and be bigger.

That’s what stardom is all about: Making everyone else better.

Some of us are doing our best and don’t even know it.

The difference between religion and spirituality is doctrine.

Let it go, like a cloud passing through the sky. Breathe through it.

Book Review: Crazy Rich Asians

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

crazyrichNothing, absolutely nothing, could have prepared Rachel Chu for the life of imperial splendor that awaited her in Singapore. The exhibitions of wealth are mind-boggling and unlike anything she had ever experienced or seen in her middle-class life as an ABC (American-born Chinese). Even Peik-Lin, a well-to-do friend in Singapore, is taken aback and comments, “I have no idea who these people are. But I can tell you one thing—these people are richer than God.”

So, who are these people in Kevin Kwan’s debut novel, Crazy Rich Asians?

Very simply, they are the rich and vulgar Anglophiles who make up the Asian Jet Set. They are also the relatives of Nick Young, the dashing young professor and heir to a massive fortune, who has invited Rachel to spend the summer in Singapore.

At its heart, the novel is a modern-day Romeo and Juliet story with dashes of the Kardashians, hints of Dallas and Falconcrest, and heavy doses of the snobbery and social rules found in Downton Abbey and Jane Austen’s novels.

Not my usual fare, but I couldn’t stop reading. I was curious to see just how far Kwan would go with the absurdity and conspicuous consumption.

The tone is set in the Prologue. After a hotel manager snubs three Chinese women and their children, one of the husbands buys the property that has served as a private club for the British elite since the reign of George IV.

We learn that Astrid, the “It” girl of Singapore society, once tossed a 39-carat diamond solitaire onto the slopes in Verbier. When Astrid suspects her husband of having an affair, she visits a small jewelry shop and buys “a three hundred and fifty thousand dollar diamond ring she didn’t much care for, a twenty-eight thousand dollar bracelet she quite liked, and a seven hundred and eight-four thousand dollar pair of earrings that make her look like Pocahontas.”

As for absurd behavior…Eleanor Young, Nick’s mother, leads the pack and will stop at nothing to discredit Rachel and send her packing. She even enlists the aid of several nasty ex-girlfriends who still hope to snag the handsome and wealthy Nick.

A good beach read, a guilty pleasure or simply a book to curl up with while waiting for Season IV of Downton Abbey.

I received this book as a Goodreads giveaway. Molte grazie Random House.

A Spectacular Second Act

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

cathymarieFor the longest time, Cathy Marie Buchanan hesitated to call herself a writer.

With her impressive credentials, BSc in Biochemistry and an MBA, Buchanan obtained positions in finance and marketing at IBM. During her academic years, however, she steered away from anything that reminded her of the less-than-stellar performance in Grade 13 English. A self-proclaimed poor speller, she avoided all essay-based courses. It wasn’t until much later that she stumbled upon evening classes in creative writing.

In spite of the late start in her forties, Buchanan wrote and launched two highly acclaimed novels: The Day the Falls Stood Still and The Painted Girls. Both books have been enthusiastically received and reviewed in Canada and the United States. The Painted Girls has been optioned for a TV series with the CW Network.

At last night’s reading (Guelph Public Library), she discussed the historical background behind the two novels and gave us insight into her writing process.

While listening, I realized why she has been described as the perfect author.

Her painstaking research takes six months to complete. Glimpses of the well-disciplined scientist are evident in the descriptive detail; she leaves very few stones unturned. After reading numerous texts and essays about Marie van Goethem, the girl behind Degas’ famed sculpture, Little Dancer Aged Fourteen, Buchanan went to Paris to complete the last phase of her research. She walked the streets that Marie walked, sat in on a class of fourteen-year-old ballet students, and attended a ballet.

The actual writing of the first draft and the final rewrite each took one-and-a-half years. An improvement, she joked, over The Day the Falls Stood Still which took two-and-a-half years to rewrite.

She may have left the corporate world behind, but she still maintains her professionalism. To this day, she works Monday to Friday, 9 to 5, and disciplines herself to write before visiting Twitter and Facebook.

A spectacular second act and inspiration for all of us!


Oprah and Karen Armstrong

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

oprahkaren

Karen Armstrong, one of the world’s leading scholars on world religions, sat down with Oprah on yesterday’s Super Soul Sunday.

She started on a linear path, entering the convent at age seventeen. While her family was not particularly devout, Karen hoped to experience transcendent moments as God became less of a remote and shadowy reality.

The reality was very different.

Up at 5:30 for morning prayers and meditation, Karen discovered that she was completely unable to pray and could not wrap her mind around meditation. From 9:30 to 12:30, she sat with the other novices doing “insufferable needlework.” Each day, her stitches were examined and ripped apart. Upset and angry, Karen found it hard to believe that God really cared about crooked seams. These daily rituals were there to keep pride and ego in check, but it was a complete waste of time for Karen. Overly concerned with her perceived failures, she was deeply embedded in ego.

More shocking was the lack of emotional comfort in pre-Vatican convents. The nuns were not allowed to befriend or comfort each other. When Karen started to have fainting spells, she was told the spells were a sign of weakness and that she was using them to draw attention to herself. On a road trip to a summer retreat, Karen developed severe nose bleeds. When she asked for a tissue, the request was denied because the box belonged to the community.

After seven stressful years (1962-1969) cut off from the world, she left the convent. Anorexic and suicidal, Karen actually believed she would end up in a locked ward. The fainting and nose bleeds continued. She had a Grand Mal seizure in 1976 and finally received a diagnosis: epilepsy.

In spite of the many hardships endured, Karen did recall several kind nuns and one positive conversation that sustained her through many dark years. While dying, a very kind Mother Superior said, “You’re a good girl, Sister, and don’t forget I told you so.”

She was anti-religious for thirteen years. God became real to her again while writing the book, A History of God. Her book, The Spiral Staircase, is a moving and revealing look at her extraordinary life.

Quotable Quotes…

Little, unrelated acts of kindness can lighten someone’s load.

The biblical God is a starter kit.

There is no religion without action.

God is that which cannot be expressed.

Book Review: The Perfume Collector

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

perfumecollectorGrace Munroe’s marriage was in trouble long before she learned of her husband’s affair. So, it’s not surprising that she acted quickly after receiving an unexpected letter, informing her that she had received an inheritance from a complete stranger.

Several days later, she boarded an airplane and took her first trip to Paris, determined to uncover the identity of Madame Eva d’Orsey, her mysterious benefactor. Grace discovers that her inheritance is a substantial one, consisting of proceeds from the sale of a property and a portfolio of stocks. And even more surprising, considering the period, Eva d’Orsey wanted Grace to be financially independent and have le droit de choisir (the right to choose).

Alternating between the two women and skillfully weaving through the decades (late 1920s to mid 1950s), author Kathleen Tessaro guides us on two amazing journeys of self-discovery, from New York to Monte Carlo to Paris and finally London.

The book is appropriately enititled, The Perfume Collector. Tessaro has beautifully described the three distinctive perfumes inspired by Eva and the complex relationship that exists between muse and artist.

One of my favorite descriptions…“His perfume highlighted her youthful freshness and yet blended naturally with her rich, musky undertones. It ‘finished’ her, gave her a polished elegance, joining the fractured sides of her together. It was astonishing how she added so much to his composition; how the very fact of her fuelled his imagination.”

Later, I was fascinated by the creative process and how easily Eva described it to a child: “It’s called enfleurage. We will gently extract the perfume oil from the blooms by pressing them into the tallow. Then we can make it into a pomade.”

If you are a fan of historical or women’s fiction, add this book to your summer reading list.

Oprah and Dr. Brian Weiss

Posted on by Joanne Guidoccio

drweiss

It is a topic that is definitely out of my comfort zone.

So, I was surprised to find myself following Dr. Brian Weiss’ conversation with Oprah on yesterday’s Super Soul Sunday.

Skeptical but curious, I suspended judgment as I listened to the traditionally educated psychiatrist describe how he came to practice past life regression therapy.

In 1980, Dr. Weiss took on Catherine, a new patient who was suffering from recurring nightmares and anxiety attacks. While under hypnosis, Catherine “crossed the invisible boundary of her current life and entered the realm of other lifetimes.” She regressed back to 1863 B.C. where she had lived as Aronda, an 18-year-old girl. Later, Catherine began to channel messages from master spirits which contained revelations about Dr. Weiss’ family and his dead son.

As Head of Psychiatry at a major hospital, he was afraid of sharing his new-found insights. But realizing that his life would never be the same again, he became a leader in the field of past-life therapy.

The best-selling author of Many Lives, Many Masters has now released another book, Miracles Happen, which he co-authored with his daughter, Amy.

Amy’s story is also a fascinating one.

When she was diagnosed with cataracts at age 25, she asked: “Why do I have the eyes of an old man?” While searching for answers, she decided to try regression therapy and went all the way back to the Middle Ages. She learned that she had inhabited the body of an old man whose eyes were blinded by fire. After her cataracts disappeared, she finally understood her father’s work intellectually and emotionally.

Quotable Quotes

Reincarnation doesn’t have to be scary. There’s more than one chance to get it right.

Sadness clouds the eyes.

All of nature is resurrection.

Energy does not have boundaries.

This, the end, is only the beginning.