When You Want to Give Up, Remember This

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

In her book, Let It Be Easy: Simple Ways to Stop Stressing & Start Living, life coach Susie Moore shares insightful gems. Here’s one of my favorites:

I love the story of a tribe in Africa that is always called on when there is a drought because, somehow, they can always make it rain with their dancing rituals. It confused anthropologists. How can dancing create rain? Surely not. But they were reported to have a 100 percent success rate.

They did nothing that the other tribes in the region didn’t do: they offered the same prayers, the same incantations, the same moves. All the rituals were very similar to those of the tribes around them. And like all the other tribes, they would dance for days or weeks. But this tribe opened the skies and the rain came down.

A member of the tribe was interviewed and asked the question: “How do you always make it rain? It seems impossible!”

He answered something that I repeat to myself whenever I want to give up.

“Oh, we dance until it rains.”

Persistence wins. It’s not glamorous or magical, which is good news. Anyone can do it, if they’re willing.

Source: Let It Be Easy, p. 242

Focus on Distance Traveled

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

In his recent release, Hidden Potential, organizational psychologist and best-selling author Adam Grant shares the character skills and motivational structures that can help people realize their potential. Here’s a thought-provoking excerpt:

You can’t tell where people will land from where they begin. With the right opportunity and motivation to learn, anyone can build the skills to achieve greater things. Potential is not a matter of where you start, but of how far you travel. We need to focus less on starting points and more on distance traveled.

For every Mozart who makes a big splash early, there are multiple Bachs who ascend slowly and bloom late. They’re not born with invisible superpowers; most of their gifts are homegrown or homemade. People who make major strides are rarely freaks of nature. They’re usually freaks of nurture.

Neglecting the impact of nurture has dire consequences. It leads us to underestimate the amount of ground that can be gained and the range of talents that can be learned. As a result, we limit ourselves and the people around us. We cling to our narrow comfort zones and miss out on broader possibilities. We fail to see the promise in others and close the door to opportunities. We deprive the world of greater things.

Source: Hidden Potential by Adam Grant, pp. 5-7

Start with a Gateway Habit

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

In his best-selling book Atomic Habits, James Clear shares practical strategies for habit formation. Here’s an excerpt from the “Make It Easy” section of the book:

Even when you know you should start small, it’s easy to start too big. When you dream about making a change, excitement inevitably takes over and you end up trying to do too much too soon. The most effective way I know to counteract this tendency is to use the Two-Minute Rule, which states, “When you start a new habit, it should take less than two minutes to do.”

You’ll find that nearly any habit can be scaled down into a two-minute version:

“Read before bed each night” becomes “Read one page.”

“Do thirty minutes of yoga” becomes “Take out my yoga mat.”

“Study for class” becomes “Open my notes.”

“Run three miles” becomes “Tie my running shoes.”

The idea is to make your habits as easy as possible to start. Anyone can meditate for one minute, read one page, or put one item of clothing away. This is a powerful strategy because once you’ve started doing the right thing, it is much easier to continue doing it. A new habit should not feel like a challenge. The actions that follow can be challenging, but the first two minutes should be easy. What you want is a “gateway habit” that naturally leads you down a more productive path.

You can usually figure out the gateway habits that will lead to your desired outcome by mapping out your goals on a scale from “very easy” to “very hard.” For instance, running a marathon is very hard. Running 5K is hard. Walking ten thousand steps is moderately difficult. Walking ten minutes is easy. And putting on your running shoes is very easy. Your goal might be to run a marathon, but your gateway habit is to put on your running shoes. That’s how you follow the Two-Minute Rule.

People often think it’s weird to get hyped about reading one page or meditating for one minute or making one sales call. But the point is not to do one thing. The point is to master the habit of showing up. The truth is, a habit must be established before it can be improved. If you can’t learn the basic skill of showing up, then you have little hope of mastering the finer details. Instead of trying to engineer a perfect habit from the start, do the easy thing on a more consistent basis. You have to standardize before you can optimize.

Source: Atomic Habits by James Clear, pp. 162-164.

The Sum of This Year

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

In A Year of Writing Dangerously, author and teacher Barbara Abercrombie shares anecdotes, insights, and solutions. She ends the book with the following advice:

You have some stories or essays now, or your first draft in some stage of completion. Or maybe you have a pile of scribbled pages or notebooks, or a computer full of notes.

Give yourself credit for anything you’ve written this year. Turn on your sweetheart voice, and let it tell you how brave you’ve been to write anything at all.

And then figure out what you’re going to do with your manuscript or notes.

Don’t give yourself the excuse of feeling overwhelmed. You’ve come this far; now get on with it.

Source: A Year of Writing Dangerously

A Timely Message

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

Last week, Norman Lear died. A visionary, he wove social commentary into mainstream comedy and revolutionized the sitcom genre. While reading many of the tributes, I came across a letter that he wrote in the late 1970s. A man named Michael Hurwitz approached and asked if Norman could write a letter to his infant niece, Lisa—a message she could open on her 21st birthday. Here’s the letter:

February 2, 1978

Dear Lisa:

The first thing you must know is that you have a remarkable uncle in the person of Michael Hurwitz. That he would be thinking about your 21st birthday while you are still in your second year, makes him very special indeed.

You’re special, too, Lisa. There is only one of you, one only in all the world, and that fact is among the things I would want you to know.

Another is an ancient definition of happiness which has meant a lot to me: “Happiness is the exercise of one’s vital abilities along lines of excellence in a life that affords them scope.”

Actually, that means two things, Lisa. First, it means that you will be happy if you are doing your thing — not necessarily achieving excellence, simply reaching for it — in a life that allows you to do so. But, it also means that happiness is something we all deliver to ourselves. No man can deliver happiness to you. No amount of loving children. No money, no status, etc. Only Lisa can make Lisa happy — and then all those wonderful alternatives like husbands, and children and money and other material things, however important they may be (and I do not mean to minimize their importance) are all extras. I repeat that I don’t mean to minimize the love of a mate or a child. I intend only to emphasize that you cannot accept that love until you deliver the essence of happiness to yourself.

There is a hope that I have for you, too. It is the hope that you go through life trusting and not wary. If you go through life trusting, you may get hurt just a little bit more, but you will never miss any of the action. If you go through life a little too wary, you may not get stepped on here and there, but you will miss far more than you will avoid.

The last thing that I would like to offer you, at the invitation of your uncle, is to remember that success is a question of how you collect your minutes. From the time you wake up each morning and do the first thing you promised yourself you would do last night, you are dealing with success or failure. For example, you promise yourself that you would get up promptly at eight and you do it. Success! Tell yourself that, immediately upon arising, you will do ten minutes of calisthenics, and you don’t. Failure! Try to make the successes outnumber the failures — and most important, count them all. If you start each day counting all the tiny successes — they have a way of adding up. Each one takes you to another plateau and so you climb through your days, your successes escalating all the while.

Have a good, happy, healthy and productive life, Lisa.

Sincerely,
Norman Lear

Source: Letters of Note website

The Best Situation

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

On Fridays, I receive Hope Clark’s newsletter, Funds for Writers. Here’s a thought-provoking essay from a recent email:

Out there, in some land, at some time there is the perfect situation for writing. We may not have it where we are. We may wonder if it’s who we are, not being the right person at the right time.

On social media, I see people sending pictures of the perfect sunset on Edisto Beach, the cutest, most perfect antics of a pet, the greatest evening of a perfect dinner with a friend. Total sigh moments.

What we don’t see is that perfect sunset on Edisto Beach was the photographer’s fourth night at the beach, and served as their best picture from a hundred and ten others.

What we don’t see is the fifty attempts at getting that sometimes annoying, sometimes sweet pet doing the right trick at just the right time.

What we don’t see is the squabbles between friends and the make-up evening with this friend at dinner, and the dozen adjustments of food, lighting, and plate to set up the setting.

The odds of finding a perfect moment the first time are small indeed. What we don’t see are the modifications, disenchantments, and frustrations of arriving at that perfect moment. Without those, without enduring the innumerable setups, test-runs, and false starts, we don’t find the perfect moment.

Sometimes we just keep on keeping on in hopes the perfect moment runs into us. That’s more the situation than not.

Success is about putting yourself in the situations that aren’t perfect to find one that is. It’s why we write, and write, and submit, and weather rejections. One day may come the acceptance and all the perks that come with it, but without weathering the imperfect moments, without seeking the perfection, we never have a chance.

Sign up to receive Hope Clark’s newsletter here.

Life’s Storms Can Be a Great Source of Strength

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

A long-time fan of bestselling authors and coaches Marc and Angel Chernoff, I look forward to reading their emails and blog posts. Here’s an excerpt from a recent email:

Hard times are like strong storms that blow against you. And it’s not just that these storms hold you back from places you are trying to go. They also tear away from you all but the essential parts of your ego that cannot be torn, so that you are left only with the foundation of who you really are.

Ultimately you realize you are here to endure these storms, to sacrifice your time and risk your heart. You are here to be bruised by life. And when it happens that you are hurt, or betrayed, or rejected, let yourself sit quietly with your eyes closed and remember all the good times you had, and all the sweetness you tasted, and everything you learned. Tell yourself how amazing it was to live, and then open your eyes and live some more.

Because to never struggle would be to never grow. You must let go of who you were so you can become who you are. Again, it is within the depths of the strongest and darkest storms that you often discover within you an inextinguishable light, and it is this light that illuminates the path forward.

Note: I highly recommend subscribing to Marc & Angel’s website.

Good Enough, Is

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

In her book, Let It Be Easy: Simple Ways to Stop Stressing & Start Living, life coach Susie Moore shares insightful gems. Here’s one of my favorites:

Did you know that perfectionism has nothing to do with high standards? It’s about failure anxiety.

A perfectionist rarely works at more than 50 percent of their potential. They’re afraid to take risks. Afraid to ask for help. Afraid to get it wrong. The common theme? Fear.

What if good enough actually is good enough? The most prolific, high-producing, creative, and successful people I know have a big bias toward action. They aim for excellence, not perfection (which doesn’t exist, anyway).

And they reap more. There’s a Spanish proverb, “More grows in the garden than the gardener knows he has planted.”

Reaping is for the planters, even messy planters. I think to myself, If this piece of work, meal, outfit, whatever, is an 8 out of 10, that’s good enough!

Better a bourgeoning, boppin’, wild, alive backyard than the perfectly coiffed rose garden that never blooms.

Source: Let It Be Easy, p. 140.

Freedom and Commitment

On Wednesdays, I share posts, fables, songs, poems, quotations, TEDx Talks, cartoons, and books that have inspired and motivated me on my writing journey. I hope these posts will give writers, artists, and other creatives a mid-week boost.

A longtime fan of The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, I picked up Warrior of the Light, an inspirational companion to the fable. The following passage is my favorite:

The Warrior hears someone say: “I need to understand everything before I can make a decision. I want to have the freedom to change my mind.”

The Warrior regards these words suspiciously. He too enjoys that freedom, but this does not prevent him from taking on a commitment, even if he does not know quite why he does so.

A Warrior of the Light makes decisions. His soul is as free as the clouds in the sky, but he is committed to his dream. On his freely chosen path, he often has to get up earlier than he would like, speak to people from whom he learns nothing, make certain sacrifices.

His friends say: “You’re not free.”

The Warrior is free. But he knows that an open oven bakes no bread.

Source: Warrior of the Light, p. 47