Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, He would have put it off until the night before and pull an all-nighter.
The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning–cold.
The Ten Commandments would actually be only five–double-spaced and written in a large font.
To limit reselling, a new edition would be published every two years.
Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn’t cafeteria food.
Paul’s letter to the Romans would become Paul’s email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Reason Cain killed Abel: They were roommates.
Reason why Moses and followers walked in the desert for 40 years: They didn’t want to ask directions and look like freshmen.
Source: Inspirational Jokes